There's been a shift

There's been a shift in my energy and Paul's energy also.  We've chosen to face each other and talk to each other from our hearts, be more vulnerable, and focus on enjoying each other instead of talking from our heads, pulling away and focusing on our faults.  We've had over a month of such sweet times and healing together.  We spent a weekend in DC and multiple weekends at home enjoying life together.  We've planned to go to Machu Picchu, spend what would have been our wedding weekend in Port Aransas and we are taking off 5 days together to spend doing SXSW fun times and have home time.  I feel very grateful and very proud of myself for making some changes that while they are small and seem obvious or easy, they are significant and require a lot of conscious effort.  It's an amazing feeling to have control over my feelings and own them for exactly what they are.  It's also so wonderful to have someone love me through those real raw feelings.  It turns out the more vulnerable and honest I am the more easily Paul can love me and the more readily he is open and vulnerable back.  Some not so novel ideas but it's a wonderful shift that has happened and I'm oh so grateful